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That was it...   Watch Post |  Post a comment


9/19/2007 2:18 pm
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BDSM. That was why I was here.

I've been discussing the quantification of BDSM with someone today *American dude I'm going to work on the assumption I'm allowed to replicate for the time being* and some stuff came up. Stuff that had me thinking. I know, bear with me, it happens from time to time and I've gotten quite good at it over the years.

The two practices in my life are BDSM and dog behaviour. Both require a good working knowledge of both biology and psychologowhatsitthing. Voodoo. Possibly.

Anyway. I can make a dog behave in a fashion desirable to its owner in one of three ways:

*I can be nice to it and encourage it with rewards.

*I can be 'vile' to it and use punitive treatment.

*I can treat it like a dog.

Decide which way you would treat/do treat your dog.

Ok. Decided? It's always version 3. However no human who has got to the stage where they call me out is ever going to be able to do that or they wouldn't have fucked up their animal in the first place.

My job is to assess the human and decide how best to instruct them to communicate with the canine. I can't teach a big scary bloke to re-pitch his voice, carry a bag of cheese treats and lose the pinch collar. So I teach him in a way he can understand how to deal with his dog without hurting it (version 2)

I can't teach a Princess-type girlie how to use her voice and body language consistantly to ensure her dog respects the rules. So I teach her how to communicate in a way that she can grasp (version 1)

Both methods lead to version 3. Dogs (with rare exceptions) will always behave to type.

I get lambasted for both methods. Why? Because both work, and both have their advocates and their detractors - each group as vocal as the other. You cannot quantify what is right and wrong with training a dog because lots of ways work.

You cannot quantify BDSM because myriads of things work and have worked for generations of people. You cannot say what is right and wrong amongst consenting adults, you cannot even say what is right and wrong when those adults are not the full shilling - alt blogs are a hotbed of mental illness of various shades, BDSM attracts those with their wiring a bit off. Ever occured to you lot that it's not you who's ill? That you're in such a huge fucking majority you should be considered 'normal'?

If I so chose I could lay claim to any number of conditions. According to medical statistics (and the off the record opinion of certain medical professionals) I can be manic, bipolar, an alcoholic (and other addictions, various), depressed, clinically depressed, autistic and a whole gamut of other things. The fact that I just choose to be in a bad mood for a few days doesn't seem to come into it. Before those of you who enjoy your special 'mental illness' badge start telling me I don't understand....just don't. Mental hypochondria exists, deal with it. Fuck. Did I say that in my outside voice?

Anyway. Where was I?

Oh yes. The most common 'complaint' about the bad people. Usually it's a male Dom giving it 'Do as I say bitch'

Had it ever occured to anyone that this may be someone's biggest fantasy? We all started somewhere; how many people have listened to the advice given them when they started? Precisely - they are on their own 'journey' and good fucking luck to them. Next week they'll be as bitter as everyone else and have a blog to prove it.

Let's not leave out the ladies. I made an excellent friend on here (who I must catch up with) whose initial contact with me was via his blog where he described pro-Dommes as 'the scourge of the BDSM community'

I'm not having that you bastard. I thought. He turned out to be very clever and funny and kind, and if I had to guess I turned out to be less of a 'scourge' than he thought.

I made a slave apologise for sending an unsolicited abusive email to a money Domme the other day, yes, 90% of them have cottoned on that this is free money and have no interest in BDSM. However the offer is there to be ignored if you so wish, and if it turns a man/woman on to give money to a complete stranger for no reason then who are we to blame the clever fucking soul who took advantage of that?

And that my friends, is the most fucking coherent I've been all week. Thankyou and goodnight.

PS - The words 'in all honesty' are no replacement for a semi-colon.


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sweetboytoy51
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9/21/2007 2:59 am
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[quote]

Happy autumnal equinox! Well, once September 22nd arrives, though the day when day and night are equal is traditionally thought to fall on September 21st in the northern hemisphere. According to Wikipedia:

"The word equinox derives from the Latin words aequus (equal) and nox (night)."

Now I want to tell nox nox jokes, and enquire nervously "who's there?" of the Things Which Go Bump In The Night.

cheers LadyC,
-sbt
demanding equality of non sequiturs for darkness and for light

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