If you are unaware of this song then make yourself aware and avail yourself of the chance to spin around until you fall over. Preferably drunkand dressed as a Strawberry.
I was Warned I suppose. Changing my status to single would flood my inbox with a biblical tide of poop.
I have toyed with identifying the prats responsible for the following, but as most of them seem to read this I shall save their blushes. At one stage I was choking with laughter on the little bitter bones they are throwing me. PAY ATTENTION TO ME! You BITCH! I will insult your intelligence, yeah, thatll win me over every time pet
I digress My top 2. There are more (its WE hate Lady C week somewhere ) Snigger.
You look sexy but ya blog turns me off- nice waist line - bad verbal line- but if you want to have a chat, and i did not want to seem offensive, please drop me a line.........
What was your point to return? So you can bash and belittle everyone? Get over yourself. You're not even brave enough to show your face! Furthermore - You're Fired!
Oh heck. Im crushed. No really, the paaaaainnnnnn. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
This is a glib phrase tossed about by the stupid and infatuated. I have, in fact, been the death of two people I know of very directly.
My first 'oops!' moment came at 16 when I intoduced my beloved friend Alison to my mate Quinn. They fell in love - hurrah! However Quinn was an heroin addict who killed her some years later in an accidental (how injecting someone else is ever accidental I'll never know) overdose. I remember her as a beggar years before, taking her for lunch and telling her how to get out of her situatuion. I remember the 'uh-huh' I got, just the same as Mum had when Step-dad was a crack dealer. I know that Uh huh.
Second was So my fault! Oooops! Every now and then I used to get so sad I'd shave my head (what I believe now is called 'doing a Britney') and let's not underplay 'so sad' SO SAD, I'd want people to hate me, just to feel something.
But He still loved me. You're nobody til somebody loves you! He knew that night was THE NIGHT! and he kissed me, and my heart pounded, and my knees buckled, and by golly I couldn't wait to see him tomorrow at work!
I am rediscovering a dormant ipod. It has lain uncharged and updated for some months.
It's fucking great! Every summer is on here - am currently standing in the middle of my room with a gale knocking at the windows listening to cuban rap, french hip hop, tagalog hip hop (oh yes) snooooooop and various other bits of my history, things felt, crushes, sad songs, happy songs. Goldie lookin fucking chain! Brilliant!
I am planning happy times. Thus far I have narrowed it down to:
My mate Max Faust coming over in April.
Torture Garden Tomorow with my very very good mate Sally.
2 gigs with my sister (one of which we will be dressed as fruit - I shall be a strawberry, apropros of nowt)
Going to see my amazing friends this weekend. The ones who pour vodka in my ears when I go to sleep and have been known to move a house party into my bedroom to wake me up.
Easter egg hunting with my Daughter.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow is always good.
Going to see buenosera. She doesn't know this yet. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Time with Z. Time with Z. Time. Time. Time. She finishes chemo in December - what a fucking Christmas we shall have.
Much happy. Much lovely people in my life. Much great music memories for my ipod.
I am going to Torture Garden on Friday, dragging round a lovely young lady on ropes made of Rosary beads with a basket of hand grenades and bunny ears on her head.
I hate Easter, in fact I'm getting kinda infuriated by all special events of late. No sooner have I ignored Valentine's day, I'm made to feel guilty about buying my Mother something, I love her all the time - why do I have to get her extra presents?
Then everyone assumes I want to drink warm beer and be nice to Irish people - there's one in my house, can I not just make him a cup of tea?
Then there's God only knows what other Saints days (except St George's which the British aren't allowed to celebrate openly lest we be accused of racism - go figure)
But what really concerns me is the fact that our economy would suffer massively if we didn't 'celebrate' all this shit. What's wrong with just having a great day every day? What's wrong with buying stuff when you want to and cause you want to and for whom you want to?
Go and buy yourself some flowers today. Even better go and buy some flowers and give them to someone you don't really talk to in your place of work, take them to an old people's home, hospital, put them on an untended tomb, give them to someone in the street.
Random acts of kindness every day. And if you need something to look forward to for your life to function - try looking forward to tomorrow.
The first boyfriend. Dave. Tall, pink long hair, arms like two sides of beef.
Took me to the Isle of Wight for the Bulldog bash, I remember very distinctly two small beautiful blonde kids who wouldn't leave us alone and the little sweet blonde girl saying she wished I was her Mummy. Sad. Her Mummy was....elsewhere, passed out.
I remember very distinctly connecting with him in a way I knew was amazing, and also that I would never see him again after that holiday. I remember him mentioning this thing called 'internet' where you could talk to people from all over the world (this was the earliest version of it - our generation will talk of it like the invention of the telephone and our grandkids will think we're all bonkers)
Dave was paraplegic. Yet his inability to walk was caused by a motor function disruption rather than a physical (he was slipstreamed from his motorbike and suffered brain damage) and when we got him drunk/other enough the guy could still walk. I watched him take down a bouncer who called him 'cripple' with two strokes of arms that moved him about all day.
Those arms supported him as we did what young lovers do.
If you're interested in pushing boundaries read on...
My tastes are wide (prolonged O4U), varied (completely unshockable) and cultured (I don't eat with my mouth open, unless it's your wet cunt), and I have a wicked sense of humour. Based near Derby in the UK, but travelling internationally.
I'm here looking for someone who can enjoy exploring and pushing their sexual boundaries. I'm 6', 12 stone, athletic build, and one of the orginal UKGB group. 'Not a hardened swinger but am chilled in group situations, and have access to the 'party' scene. I have professional camera and video equipment, and a range of 'party partners' (m+f) available.
I have been very firmly Dom up until quite recently, then, out of the blue, I came to understand the true satisfaction of submission.
If I meet as a 'single', you'll be adventurous, and sophisticated, with a willingness to probe your darker side. 'Sick' girls welcome!
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Say My name bitch. As I can only assume the UKGB in this instance stands for United Kingdom Gay Boys...