Don't tell anyone, but I think I got my nasty side back. Life is getting like a series of rather perverse flash backs. Images of a thousand cuts, a rather unsavoury use for a patisserie, something interesting involving entrails, there's a toga in there too (but I have been reading a lot about Nero - horses rest easy, not my bag) Fire, the sudden and overwhelming urge to own a sled team of Emo girls.
So. There was this BIG Thunderstorm, and, and hail and stuff and things were going KABOOM and then there was rain and, and PINK Lightning and rain so hard it set car alarms off and, and I made some cakes, they were supposed to be cookies but I did something wrong and now they're cakes.
Whilst playing the collective noun game (you go through all the clever ones you know and then start making them up) I got to thinking y'all might want to help me out here. The ones I'm looking for today are the collective nouns for:
Ghosts Magicians Microsoft engineers Candles Perverts Dragons Dr Seuss Books
Please feel free to make them up (I actively encourage it you know) they don't have to be clever either. In fact Stupid is better.
Quite possibly the most funcking fantastic greeting ever created. Brings together the quintissentially English habit of using the word 'Ho' as a greeting and has fantastic scope for bemusing the fuck out of people (this greeting faded out in the early part of the century)
Anyway, blog wars, again, seriously I'm kinda over it. Especially as all the people who waded in to add their twopennyworth are excellent creative writers in their own right who I usually enjoy reading.
I feel it should all be sorted by a mass ALT online game of 'Worms' winner takes all. and I will man the custard cannon.
I own two very large, very intimidating dogs. I also train very large, very intimidating dogs for the owners of London who want their dogs to be a credit not a menace.
I live in a built-up area of London and I counsel and train owners with dog/people fear aggression issues. I am also a rare breed specialist.
Both of my large, intimidating dogs walk off leash at pretty much all times. If you understand anything of American Pit bull mentality it may give you an idea of the temperament of my animals (APBT not here used as an emotive statement but an accurate description) So why do I let them roam?
Because they love and respect me so much that the idea of being more than 4 feet away is more devastating to them than being chained to me and unable to protect me if the occasion arose. Unleashed they are relaxed and friendly, the minute I place a hand on their collars they become Cerberus minus a head...
Sometimes you have to let go of the leash to let someone prove their love