Mind the doormouse.

Stop Watching This Blog (50)

I don't drink water - fish fuck in it.

This blog is visible to alt members only. If I find any of it reproduced elsewhere I will dice your spleen and pan fry it.

It's real! It's real! Mar 12, 2008 6:27 pm
576 views
Betcha by golly wow! You're the one that I've been waiting for forever.

Gosh - It'd be so easy wouldn't it?

Humans are wired up all wrong. This isn't their fault. But some of them should know better.

Those of you who are astute will know that LC is now single. And wanting her yummu mummies more than ever.

You'll be there even when the stupid boys have untangled themselves. Remembered you exist. etc etc
2 comments
What to wear Mar 10, 2008 4:58 pm
540 views
This Friday. Simply because I can't be arsed making up my own mind. Suggestions also welcome.
Nothing
Nothing except gold leaf
Leaves
Full latex catsuit
Bin bag
Jam
My big poufe skirt that makes me look like a spanish lady loo roll holder
Crystals/sparkly things glued to myself
A corset
Other
   
3 comments , 28 votes
I love Edward Mar 7, 2008 8:37 pm
320 views

From the man who brought us the madness hamsters, the penguin of death and the butterfly of freedom; now come such magical thoughts as:

Marvellous marvellous
Lovely lovely lovely
Wonderful wonderful
wonderful YOU!

(dressed as a banana)
0 comments
come together Mar 7, 2008 8:19 pm
423 views

Alt does funny things to people.

Especially when you happen to have London's biggest static dungeon as your living room.

We're all doing competitive blogging about this one shortly, but suffice to say I have just spent a magnificent evening in the company of and UnTamedGirly et amigos and have rarely been as happy.

Bod was 1,000 times more than I was expecting (me and me fancy London ways) and UTG may well be, quite possibly the most naturally attractive woman I have ever met. That's my excuse for nearly ending up having one of my naps on Bod's chest as UTG did unspeakable things to his privates.

A beautiful beautiful thing, and oft to be repeated. I have also just had a certain Faust on the line, I'm assuming he wants to move his trip to LDN forward....
1 comment
Cockchafer Mar 7, 2008 9:06 am
414 views

My sister has asked me to consider the poor Cockchafer beetle, who only goes out at night.

Presumably to avoid the taunts of his peers.

I love my sister.
1 comment
Trouble Mar 5, 2008 4:19 pm
372 views

Who's In London on Friday and wants to get up to high jinks?
0 comments
Chat vacuum Mar 4, 2008 2:33 pm
390 views

I went in a chatroom here on alt.

Wow. Racy. JUST what I needed to scratch that itch. It was similar to a group of people wandering round an Escher drawing.

Someone has come in.
Someone has left.
Someone has fallen over.
Hi room.
Someone has been sick in a corner.
Someone is a bit lost.
Someone else has come in.
Someone has spiked the punch.
Someone is telling everyone what's on the TV.
Someone has come in.
Someone has gone out.
Someone is crawling across the ceiling.

I don't bloody know. The one time I could do with a real bout of online stranger naked webcam picture filth festival I end up in an old people's home.

Curses.
1 comment
Baby Oil Mar 3, 2008 12:52 pm
530 views

What the fuck is that all about?

Baby's do not secrete nor make it, they are never dressed in it because they become impossible to catch, nor is it meant for their consumption or amusement.

Why is it called fucking baby oil? Other than an aside to mention it may destroy condoms.
4 comments
You can't always get what you want. Feb 25, 2008 1:22 pm
573 views

But if you try sometimes, you just might find. You get what you need.

Or a slap in the chops.


Pic - me and twinkletoes partypants finding something VERY amusing about latex
1 comment
I got you under my skin Feb 21, 2008 6:10 pm
492 views

I've been singing this for a while now.

Ive got you under my skin
Ive got you deep in the heart of me
So deep in my heart, that youre really a part of me
Ive got you under my skin


My best mate Z is my age (30) and is having a mastectomy.

Ive tried so not to give in
Ive said to myself this affair never will go so well
But why should I try to resist, when baby will I know than well
That Ive got you under my skin


We've laughed, not cried yet. That's for another day.

I would sacrifice anything come what might
For the sake of having you near
In spite of a warning voice that comes in the night
And repeats, repeats in my ear


To make matters more funny/ridiculous/mind-numbingly sad, her Dad dropped dead of a massive heart attack the day before her surgery so she decided to postpone. Unable to face losing her Dad and her breast in one week. Fair play.

Dont you know you fool, you never can win
Use your mentality, wake up to reality
But each time I do, just the thought of you
Makes me stop before I begin
cause Ive got you under my skin


I imagine them, like little clusters of eggs with malevolent intent. Sitting in her. Snuggling in the warmth under her armpit. Waiting to hatch.

There is something black and desperate about the concept of a World without her. Everyone tells us how good medical science is, and how everything will be OK. But only she and I and her sister ever suffer that frisson of utter terror. That cold dripping of icy nothingness that accompanies the tainted.

If it were a kidney I would give her mine, if it were a lung I would cope with one. But there is nothing I can give her to make her stronger now; which is annoying.

There is nothing.
2 comments

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